That’s not Maurice Clarett talking [well, come to think of it, maybe it is Maurice Clarett talking].

But it’s me talking, too.

And maybe also Iowa football coach Kirk Ferentz.

Why? Because, from what I hear today, Clarett’s "mutiple-game suspension" at Ohio State will end just in time for him to face Iowa in an Oct. 18 Big Ten football game at Columbus, Ohio.

The Cleveland Plain Dealer said Clarett will miss six games because of suspensions for violating NCAA rules and giving false statements to campus police.

If true, that means the tailback who was once considered a favorite for the Heisman Trophy will miss games against Washington, San Diego State, North Carolina State, Bowling Green, Northwestern and Wisconsin.

Game No. 7 will be against Iowa, a team the Buckeyes shared the Big Ten title with last season.

Just great, huh?

I really think Clarett should be suspended for the season because of what happened. He reported losses of $800 in cash and $9,500 in merchandise after a 2001 Chevrolet Monte Carlo was burglarized in April. What they say in Columbus is that Clarett borrowed the car from a local dealership.

Oh, sure.

Despite the suspension, Clarett was allowed to start practicing with the team after missing the first 23 practices.

"This is a subject that no one seems to want to deal with.

"I noticed in a Brad Banks interview [in the Iowa City Press-Citizen last season] that he mentioned he drove a Lincoln Navigator.

"Considering his humble background, I thought this was odd. His father is a contracted sugar farmer and they live in a small home, if the stories are correct. I couldn’t make the connection between poor sugar farmer to college senior driving a Navigator. And I said so on a few Internet boards.

"My posts were deleted very quickly….I assume no one wants to touch this for obvious reasons….

"With all the crap going on with Missouri, Baylor, ISU, OSU and others, it seemed the right time. I’m going to be nailed for this, but if there is nonsense going on, I don’t want Iowa fans to find out about it down the road. Let’s deal with it now. It might turn out to be something as benign as a rich uncle….

"The last thing I wish for is an Iowa program in trouble. But this sounded fishy to me and no one has taken a minute out of their time to look into it."

I e-mailed the fan with some questions. Banks, of course, no longer plays quarterback for the Hawkeyes after leading them to an 11-2 record and finishing second in the Heisman Trophy voting last season.

"I don’t think Brad would tell big fish stories for his own gratification," the e-mailer said. "Also, I have to think that an athlete driving a Navigator around Iowa City would be noticed by someone, especially opposing teams. As far as I know, no one has uttered a word about it."

Just to show that I’ve started doing some research, a Lincoln Navigator—well, a new Lincoln Navigator anyway—will cost you a cool $52,000 or so. I don’t know if that price includes rebates or not. I also don’t know if Banks’ Navigator was new.

As they say in the booth, stay tuned.

1. "The coach says your question is unanswerable, as my athletic director has not cleared me to talk on that item!"
2. "The coach says you might be correct, but I have not checked the police blotter in the last 24 hours."
3. "I told the coach I would continue going to classes until the last game of the season, a bowl trip or a Blue-Gray game, whichever occurs first."
4. "As I told the NCAA investigators, I saw him wearing a bunch of diamond and gold."
5. "Yes, he says he is the best at that position, but he needs experience!"
6. "I think the BCS is just a bunch of crap. Why doesn’t the NCAA sanction a true football playoff, ending two weeks before the Super Bowl?"
7. "It doesn’t matter that the football season begins on about Aug. 30 and ends 12 games later. We just allow them an outlet from studies for the fall semester."