George Marshall, Jr., 33° , PGHP, PGC, IX°, KYGCH(2), Director of Work, Webmaster

DO WE CARE?

I once asked a man, "What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? He answered: 'I don't know---and I don't care.'" Obviously, this is a fallacious little tale I used as an introduction but it conceals a powerful truth--too many of us today are like that man when confronted with the question: "Why is Masonry declining in membership so quickly?", and many of us seem to be responding with the same answer he used. And the question is not trivial. Masonry today is, relatively speaking, in a freefall state of decline and has been so since the early 1960s. The bulk of this decline is not attributable to death or demit but rather to an alarming rate of SNPDs. Why do good Masons choose to go SNPD rather than remain a part of our Craft? There are many reasons: family and job pressures, moving away from the area where the Brother's Masonic activities were and then failing to transfer or become active in the new locale; chronic sickness or poor health; activity in other civic or religious organizations; financial reversals; etc. But the principal reason seems to be: they do not perceive Masonry as being relevant to the lives--that is, Masonry is failing to provide them with the brotherly concern and activity that motivated them to join in the first place. Now we know--do we care? Apparently not. We continue on in the same old time-honored way and in the same old ruts that our forefathers in Masonry trod. Meetings every so often-- some dull business, even duller speeches, and every now and then a degree to liven things up. And the end result is a continuing stream of SNPDs. Everyone seems to be looking for some miracle panacea, some magical "silver bullet", some profound elixir of rejuvenation to apply to Masonry and "poof!" all will be cured and our doors will be flooded at every meeting with members vying with each other to carry forward the banner of Masonry. But I believe that the answer does not lie in hoping for some Masonic wizard to come along and wave his wand to solve our problem. I believe that the problem is not insoluble but that it will take some reorientation of our mindset and some patient application before we can expect to see results. First, let me say what I believe will NOT help us in the long run:

1. One-day Blue Lodge Classes--this has been tried in some states and while the initial membership numbers may be gratifying, the retention statistics of such "one-day wonders" already indicates that they are not staying in any better than those who receive the three degrees by conventional methods.
2. Expecting everyone to have a deep and abiding interest in the ritual. Unfortunately, many Masons tend to equate Masonic capability and knowledge with ritualistic ability. Thus the push to produce "educated" Masons by producing "ritualists." But we must realize that there are many talents that Masonry can utilize and must utilize other than the ability to memorize words and act well.
3. The "sink or swim" treatment. Far too often, when we raise a new Brother, we do not follow through with the same concern and care we showed when he was learning his lessons and receiving the previous degrees. I call this the "sink or swim" treatment; that is, we wrongly assume that he will now jump in and become an active, contributing member. The problem here is that we in most cases overly expect; we make the fallacious assumption that every new member is a self-starter and knows the ropes. So we leave him to his own devices and trust that he will jump right in and contribute. Here is where a well-thought out mentoring plan would be valuable; also, we need a viable plan to integrate new members into the life of the Fraternity by giving them specific duties and responsibilities to perform in order that they will feel needed and appreciated.

THE FIRST EVER BLONDE GUY JOKE

An Irishman, a Mexican and a blonde guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, 'Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building.'
The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed,' Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too.'
The blonde opened his lunch and said, 'Bologna again! If I get a bologna sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too.'
The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage, and jumped to his death.
The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito, and jumped, too.
The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.
At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said, 'If I'd known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!'
The Mexican's wife also wept and said, 'I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn't realize he hated burritos so much.'
Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife. The blonde's wife said, 'Don't look at me. He made his own lunch.'

FISH STORY

A customer at the a local market's fresh fish counter marvelled at the fishmonger's quick wit and intelligence.
"Tell me, Fishmonger, what makes you so brainy?"
"I wouldn't share my secret with just anyone," the fishmonger replies, lowering his voice so the other shoppers won't hear. "But since you're a good and faithful customer, I'll let you in on it. Fish heads. You eat enough of them, you'll be positively brilliant."
"You sell them here?" the customer asks.
"Only $2 apiece," he says.
The customer buys three. A week later, he's back in the store complaining that the fish heads were disgusting and he isn't any smarter.
"You didn't eat enough, " said the fishmonger. The customer goes home with 20 more fish heads. Two weeks later, he's back and this time he's really angry.
"Hey you," he says, "You're selling me fish heads for $2 apiece when I can buy the whole fish for a $1. You're ripping me off!"
"You see?" said the Fishmonger. "You're more intelligent already."