3/02/05
REALITY CHECK!
Hi everyone! At breakfast this morning it was very apparent that most of the families in our group had either little or no sleep last night. After reading the previous day's post, I decided that before I get into the details of today's activities, It would be good to spend a little time talking about some of the more difficult things we encounter in these first days with newly adopted children. I think it is important for everyone to understand that noone receives a perfect, well adjusted baby from the get-go.
All of the children in our group are coming out of foster care and have no doubt formed a strong bond with their foster mother. Two days ago, they were removed from their comfortable environment and given to strangers. These babies are grieving and lonely for their foster parents - some cry a lot, some show almost no emotion- at least not right away. Macey often says "aah-yah" - in the local dialect this is a word for mother. As much as we would like this to be directed toward us, she is really asking for her foster mom. She definitely does her share of crying. You'll notice that in the pictures I've posted, she is always being held by Julie (unless she is crying or sleeping) - if I was holding her awake, she would most likely be crying. It is obvious that she was held a lot by her foster mom and has spent the majority of her time with women. This is fairly normal and the other dads in our group are experiencing the same thing - it will pass with time.
Developmentally, Macey is closer to a 7-8 month old than a 13 month old child. She can sit up by herself, but is nowhere near walking. In fact, out of the 5 girls in our group, only one has taken any unassisted steps, the rest haven't shown any signs of crawling. There are a couple of reasons for this: 1) it is common for foster parents to place infants in walkers instead of on the floor (floors are often cold and/or dirty) so they don't learn how to be mobile without the walker 2) bundled up in 5-6 layers of clothing, even if they were out of the walker, they are hardly able to move, much less crawl.
Health wise, other than a cold and a sore on her right foot, Macey is very healthy. She eats well and is not malnourished. We started antibiotics today, which should help clear up her nose. The other kids in the group are in similar condition.
Again, I am not complaining in any way! We love our little Macey MinPing and have been very blessed! We wouldn't change her for the world- I just wanted everyone to understand the reality of our situation and what to expect when we get home and also that this is normal for most Chinese adoptions. It will not take long for Macey to catch up to the rest of the pack after she returns home.
We are very lucky in that Macey is a good sleeper and has allowed us to sleep through the night...hopefully that will continue this evening.
OK - on the the fun stuff!
Our first outing today consisted of two stops - the first was to Nanchang's largest porcelain shop. Jiangxi province is known for their fine porcelain and Nanchang is at the center of it. They have several sayings to describe the fine porcelain, they transate as 'white as jade', 'thin as paper', and 'bright as a mirror'. The pieces in the shop were fantastic. Some of the vases were over 10 feet tall. Everything was hand-painted and beautiful.
Outside the shop, a group of elderly chinese men were very intrigued by our group. After taking a closer look at one of the children, one elderly gentleman exclaimed "that look like Chinese baby!". Although adoptions seem very common to us, apparently they are still somewhat of a curiosity to many of the Chinese, especially the older generations.
After the porcelain shop, we went to the Teng Wang Pagoda. This is a magnificent building that was built in 960AD. The gardens and details of the structures were awesome.
Afterwards we went back to the Hotel to give the kids a nap.
Late afternoon, we made an unplanned excursion to.....if you can believe it.....Super Wal-Mart for some supplies. It was three stories tall and packed with people. It most exciting thing about the trip was the death-defying taxi ride there and back. NO WAY I could ever drive here - stoplights, traffic lanes, and right-of-way mean nothing!
Finally, cute pictures of the day:
Yes, Macey is eating 'Chinese Funyons'
Bye!