The first thing that struck me was the smell of her hair. The Subaru I was used to had smelled of elegant flower such as roses or exotic fruits, just like any high classed lady probably would have done as a requirement of her social activities. This Subaru however, was nothing like that. She smelled like leather, probably from her wheelchair, soap and the natural smell of a simple human being, a mixture of sweat and her own personal fragrance.

 

This was how she really smelled, this was Subaru.

 

This was no longer the elegant but compassionate lady who had run the Scarlet Knights with a steady hand since it’s formation, neither was this the broken but enlightened girl I had waited for and encountered in that lonesome cave back in The World.

 

This was really her, the real Subaru.

 

The one who had wanted to meet me.

 

The Subaru who had waited for me.

 

I doubted that I would ever have wakened up from my coma if it hadn’t been her words of encouragement and wisdom. No one, not even Mimiru or Bear had been able to tell me those words she had gored into my very being. She had taken all the insecurity, insanity and lonesomeness away with a simple gesture of her hand, a smile and a couple of words.

 

I hadn’t needed to understand. Nothing at all.

 

The only thing I had needed then was to take her hand and stand there, gazing up towards the artificial stars of The World. I had been content; I had been happy and secure for the first time in my life.

 

Ironic isn’t it?

 

That I would find my first state of peacefulness in a world which only existed in form of a couple of servers. Some would call it pathetic, I guess they’re right; I never was a rage of a person anyway.

 

The time we had spent together in our Virtual Reality had been a hard one, I wasn’t exactly an easy person to get to but she had stood her ground. She even sacrificed the Knighthood over my issue, the knights had been her greatest accomplishments in The World, the most powerful organisation in the whole game and she had dismantled it without a moment of hesitation. I never fully understood that issue however, no longer had I heard about the knights’ fate before I had found Subaru in that water cave, beaten and ripped, barely an inch from game death.

 

Come to think of it, this is the second time I am holding her like this; the other time had been different however. She had still been Lady Subaru then, no longer the leader of the Scarlet Knights but still a noble and respected player by all means. There had been a lingering smell of blood and dirt that time however since her physical state had been anything but good. She should have just logged out then but her pride had kept her playing, her intuition leading her to me. I don’t know how long we spent holding each other in that cave; I had lost all concept of the passing of time during my game coma but in the end, Subaru had fallen asleep in my arms.

 

Probably the only time she had suffered game exhaustion.

 

My brave, kind and enigmatic Subaru.

 

The very same Subaru I was holding in my arms again with the critical difference of reality and game this time. This Subaru had long black hair instead of her green, shoulder-long princess cut. A pair of glasses decorated her slighter longer face instead of the rune imprint I usually recognized with her forehead.

 

And thank heavens, no battle axe.

 

She had fallen out of her wheelchair in her attempt to reach me. I was on my knees, cradling her small figure to me in an almost choking embrace. Her arms encircled my neck as she cried into my jacket, mumbling something I failed to hear but it really didn’t matter. I stroke my hand through her hair as we sat on the sidewalk beside her fallen wheelchair, I know we were making a scene but the rest of the world could just sod off for this moment, both the real and the virtual one.

 

I am here.

 

I am truly here with Subaru in my arms.

 

I can smell, feel and see her with my real senses.

 

We are finally free. I would not be running from reality anymore and she would not hide her pain in taking virtual responsibilities.

 

Yes, don’t worry anymore Subaru, I am truly and really here and I will be staying. Facing reality will still be difficult, the few fragments of memories of my father still hung like a dark cloud over my mind but that is ok.

 

Just for now, let us stay like this.

 

Cry until you feel better Subaru.

 

I will stay here with you, forever.